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Speaking a EulogyThis funeral speech can be given by a member of the family, by a close friend, a religious leader or, in the case of a non-religious funeral, the person officiating. Check the details If you're writing the speech yourself you need to check with the family any details of the persons life that they particularly want to be included or particularly wantleft out. To memorise or not? Once your speech has been written, don't try to memorise it unless you are an expert in using your memory. The day will be stressful enough without having to remember the words of a speech. Emotions are bound to be running high so have the words in front of you - this also means that someone else can read it for you if necessary. Important words Have the eulogy written (or printed) on sheets of A5 paper and stick these onto card (so that it looks like a greeting card). You then need to underline the first and last sentence. Then read through the eulogy out loud and underline the most important words. These words and sentences which are underlined are the places where you should look up and make eye contact with the listeners. Slow down Evertime you come to a 'comma', or 'fullstop', say 'comma' or 'fullstop' to yourself. This will make sure that there is a big enough pause between each thought and will prevent you from trying to say the whole funeral speech in one breath! This slowing down of your speech is important because it will give the listeners a chance to digest what you have just said. Try it now, just pick up a newspaper, magazine or book that is on the desk next to your computer and read a couple of sentences out loud. Another easy way to slow down is to make sure that you open your mouth wide enough for the vowel sounds and also sound all the consonant sounds. Exercises which can be practised at home can be found here. Eulogy poem Some people like to include a poem in their eulogy and the rules for reading this aloud are much the same as for ordinary prose. The main difference is that the pauses in a poem are probably more important than in prose because they help the poem keep its shape. If the poem doesn't have a comma or fullstop at the end of the line, a breath mustn't be taken. The sense has to carry on to the next line. If you need to take a breath, try to grab one in the middle of the line. An example of this can be shown in the following poem. This is from 'Sea Fairies' by Eileen Mathias. They're hiding by the pebbles, They're running round the rocks Each of them, and all of them In dazzling sea green frocks.
In the third line you need to take a breath after 'them' and then carry on to the end of the verse without another breath.
For a list of poems suitable for funerals click here. Emotions If you're reading the eulogy as a family member or friend of the deceased, it's very likely that you'll be overcome with emotion. This isn't surprising and should be expected - just pause and try to compose yourself. If you feel unable to carry on, ask the person officiating to continue reading the speech for you. Common Sense If you'd like some common sense tips on how to deliver your eulogy look here. Brevity The listeners and speaker (you) are bound to be very upset, and although you will all want to honor the deceased, try to keep the speech as brief as possible. Be positive, add humour if appropriate and keep it short.
For a five part course to improve your speaking skills click here.
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